Roman Around

combating liberalism and other childish notions

Posts Tagged ‘Deepwater Horizon’

BAYOU DOLT

Posted by Andrew Roman on June 17, 2010

From the “World Class Morons” file …

On Tuesday, just hours before the President sat at his Oval Office desk and said nothing before 32 million prime time television viewers, British Petroleum President, Lamar McKay, was being grilled at a House Energy and Commerce Committee hearing about the Gulf oil spill.

Congressman Joseph Cao, Republican from Louisiana, used the opportunity to do what any clear-thinking, sane-minded individual wishing to find solutions to a most tragic situation would do – suggest that a company big wig disembowel himself.

After all, what says “problem solving” more than suggesting that someone commit suicide to make things right?

Besides, what would ease the pain and suffering of the affected people of the Gulf region more than to have the President of BP stab himself with a sword?

From Fox News:

“Well, in the Asian culture, we do things differently. During the Samurai days, we’d just give you the knife and ask you to commit hara-kiri,” said Cao, who is Vietnamese-American. “My constituents are still debating on what they want me to ask you to do.”

Cao went on to complain about BP’s response in his district, which he said is suffering “great economic impact” from the oil spill.

“The clean-up process has been a disgrace. The claims process has been dismal,” Cao said.

To repeat, Cao is a Vietnamese-American. Harakiri – or more accurately, seppuku – is a Japanese form of ritual suicide.

No matter, though.

All of those Asians look alike anyway, don’t they Mr. Cao?

Another numbskull from Nitwit County heard from …


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OBAMA PROMISES THAT GULF WILL RETURN TO NORMAL – GULF SAYS, THANK YOU SAVIOR

Posted by Andrew Roman on June 15, 2010

leadership

I can assure you, I am fully appreciative of the magnitude of the oil spill disaster in the Gulf of Mexico. The repercussions, both environmentally and economically, are extremely serious. Even the President, some fifty-plus days after the explosion that killed eleven human beings on the Deepwater Horizon rig and triggered the oil spill, has had to suck it up and acknowledge that conditions on the ground justify that attention be diverted from him to the Gulf Coast. (It must be very difficult for him).

And with Barack Obama scheduled to speak from the Oval Office tonight on the situation – where the teleprompters are big and beautiful – poised to use the oil spill as a springboard into more government growth, the stage is set for thrills to make their way up a whole lot of mainstream media legs.

This will be leadership on full display.

This will be the moment for the young metrosexual from Chicago to lay his critics to waste and exert the kind of strength and eloquence (albeit almost two months late) that the media has been singing about around the campfire for three years.

This will be the political Viagra that will invigorate a flaccid and disappointing presidency.

*cough*

But make no mistake about it … it doesn’t matter how many politically expedient, hyper-arrogant, camera-friendly promises Barack Obama makes, the Gulf region will recover from the oil spill in spite of him and his world class ineptitude. He can get up in front of all the cameras he wants and pretend to know how to lead, how to inspire, how to exude confidence, making promises about how the Gulf region will return to normal someday, but it means absolutely nothing. He might as well stand in a driving rain storm and promise that the sunshine will return.

Things will, indeed, return to normal, regardless of what he says or does.

This is not to minimize what’s happened there, but the Anointed One need not bother faking leadership or project some transparent façade of strength nearly two months after the fact; his image as a clueless, supremely detached, disconnected Golfer-In-Chief has long since been established.

Without question, the Gulf region will recover – without the blessings, assurances and soundbite-ready promises of politician Barack H. Obama.

Nature is funny that way.

The Earth, probably to the shock of many, has an uncanny capacity to heal herself, despite the screechings of the hysterical doomsayers of the world.

That’s not to suggest that the oil spill is not a big deal.

It obviously is.

The livelihoods of Americans are being aversely affected. The damage being done environmentally cannot be denied. It is an accident of monumental proportion that will be dealt with, even with Barack Obama in the White House.

But it is not the end of civilization as we know it. The day of environmental reckoning has not come. It is not even close to being on par with the terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001, as President Obama has suggested.

And if the President wants to sashay up to the cameras hoping to save face on a disastrous presidency – you might call it the Gulf oil spill of presidencies – and promise the American people that the Gulf will return to normal, let him.

Of course things will return to normal.

It will take time.

But it will have nothing to do with Barack Obama and his photo-op astroturf promises.
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SWAT TEAMS DISPATCHED

Posted by Andrew Roman on April 30, 2010

Am I missing something here?

Perhaps I’m operating under a complete misconception, but I must ask: Since when does the Department of the Interior have their own SWAT team, and why are they being sent to the Gulf of Mexico to inspect oil rigs?

I didn’t realize that SWAT teams were trained to conduct such investigations. (Actually, I didn’t realize that SWAT teams were trained to conduct any investigations).

I wonder if the Department of Agriculture has its own paratrooper unit.

The word SWAT, of course, stands for Special Weapons and Tactics.

As Wikipedia accurately explains:

They are trained to perform high-risk operations that fall outside of the abilities of regular officers. Their duties include performing hostage rescues and counter-terrorism operations, serving high risk arrest and search warrants, subduing barricaded suspects, and engaging heavily-armed criminals. A SWAT team is often equipped with specialized firearms including assault rifles, submachine guns, shotguns, carbines, riot control agents, stun grenades, and high-powered rifles for snipers. They have specialized equipment including heavy body armor, entry tools, armored vehicles, advanced night vision optics, and motion detectors for covertly determining the positions of hostages or hostage takers inside of an enclosed structure. 

The move is a response by Obamacrats to the Deepwater Horizon oil rig explosion of April 21st. Nearly 5,000 barrels of oil are pouring into the Gulf of Mexico each day.

Whether SWAT teams will be able to negotiate a peaceful resolution with the escaping oil is unknown at this time.

Perhaps next time someone in Washington can send highly trained personnel with weapons to the border ofh Mexico instead of the Gulf of Mexico.

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