Roman Around

combating liberalism and other childish notions


Posted by Andrew Roman on June 11, 2010

Not that she was dressed inconspicuously to begin with. Not that anyone believes she was not going to show everyone her bejeweled bra and panties by the time it was all said and done. Not that she didn’t know exactly what she was doing.

Sure, she “pitched a fit,” to quote the New York Post, but there’s no way the entire incident at Citi Field yesterday afternoon in New York just happened. Highly recognizable pop divas don’t sort of show up at baseball games with open leather jackets, exposed cleavage and studded headbands hoping not to be noticed by the press.

The middle finger thing was icing on her narcissistic pie.

Lady Gaga’s “tirade” at a San Diego Padre-New York Mets baseball game – where she stripped down to her studded underwear and hurled enough expletives to make Saturday Night Fever sound like an episode of Dora the Explorer – reeks of contrivance. Let’s give credit where credit is due.

That’s not to say she wasn’t an “amazin’ disgrace,” as the Post called her.

She was.

That’s not to say she isn’t a flash-in-the-skillet, tedious dullard with music that only roller-skating rink DJs and close relatives will remember ten years from now. That’s not to say that I don’t find the ingredient list on a packet of tropical punch Kool Aid more engaging.

I simply think most people are interpreting what happened all wrong.

Indeed, she is just another spoiled brat celebrity, but this is about marketing.

Gaga showed up during the fifth inning of the day game against the San Diego Padres and was furious that her front-row seats were so close to photographers covering the game.
Instead of sitting, she vanished into a lower-deck concourse — only to reappear in the seventh inning in the empty luxury box owned by Met super-fan Jerry Seinfeld.

By the time fans and photographers spotted her, she had shed her coat to reveal bedazzled undies that looked like the get-up she wore in the video for her single “Telephone.”

The beer-swilling diva — who has professed her love for the Yankees — proceeded to repeatedly salute the crowd with her middle finger. When fans rose for the seventh-inning stretch, she did, too — dancing and giving onlookers the double-bird salute. She watched the rest of the game in just her undergarments without incident.

“She was psyched to go the game,” a source close to Gaga told The Post. “But she felt it was unfair that she was seated right by the paparazzi. Having them take pictures of her all game would’ve been annoying to all the fans. That was going to ruin it for everyone.”

Anyone who believes that last paragraph, please stand on your head.

The last thing Lady Gaga cares about is how her actions will affect anyone else. Exposing everything except genetalia while publicly flipping off the photographers of the press – with adults in attendance who just aren’t interested in what her underwear looks like, not to mention children – are not the actions of a person concerned with the well-being of fellow fans.

Besides, the world revolves around her, and the rest of us had better get that through our non-paparazzi-ravaged heads.

And if – that’s a big if – she had no inkling that she was going to be photographed by the press while at a public event like a major league baseball game, then she ought to defer to the box of rocks, because there isn’t an instrument in creation that can measure the “dumb” she owns.
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