Roman Around

combating liberalism and other childish notions

MORE POLLUTION! THE EARTH NEEDS IT!

Posted by Andrew Roman on April 20, 2010

It's his fault!

From the “Huh?” file …

I know I’ve said this before, as have many others, but if the radical environmental movement continues on its current path, the “parody” industry will surely go bankrupt. The unemployment lines will swell disproportionately with the ranks of out-of-work comedy writers, disenfranchised satirists and down-on-their-luck stand-up jokesters. Publications like “The Onion” could go extinct.

For example, there was a time when someone could say “global warming causes global cooling,” and it was considered absurdly funny.

Today, it is accepted as reality by the environmentally hysterical.

Long ago, when the Maharishi of myth, Al Gore, would arrive for a lecture on global warming in sub-zero temperatures, it was hilariously ironic.

Today, it is explained away as a natural consequence of man-made climate change.

Each day, it seems, new paths to the inevitable catastrophe awaiting us all come to light.

The latest cause of the planet’s rapid approach to a steady boil is none other than that old planet-killing stand-by, pollution.

But it’s not what you think.

The rub here is not that there is too much pollution, but that there is too little.

Eli Kintisch of the Los Angeles Times says cleaner air could speed up the global warming process:

You’re likely to hear a chorus of dire warnings as we approach Earth Day, but there’s a serious shortage few pundits are talking about: air pollution. That’s right, the world is running short on air pollution, and if we continue to cut back on smoke pouring forth from industrial smokestacks, the increase in global warming could be profound.

Cleaner air, one of the signature achievements of the U.S. environmental movement, is certainly worth celebrating. Scientists estimate that the U.S. Clean Air Act has cut a major air pollutant called sulfate aerosols, for example, by 30% to 50% since the 1980s, helping greatly reduce cases of asthma and other respiratory problems.

But even as industrialized and developing nations alike steadily reduce aerosol pollution — caused primarily by burning coal — climate scientists are beginning to understand just how much these tiny particles have helped keep the planet cool. A silent benefit of sulfates, in fact, is that they’ve been helpfully blocking sunlight from striking the Earth for many decades, by brightening clouds and expanding their coverage. Emerging science suggests that their underappreciated impact has been incredible.

I promise you this is not a leftover post from the 1st of April.

I have not (to the best of my knowledge) had any heavy narcotics slipped into my single-serving fruit cup.

I am not an animal.

Apparently, we never knew how good we had it when we had more of a devil-may-care approach to pollution.

As a child, I gave a hoot and didn’t pollute. Little did I know I was turning up the burner on Mother Earth.

I never realized how much of a bastard I really am.

Damn you, Woodsy Owl!!!

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