Roman Around

combating liberalism and other childish notions


Posted by Andrew Roman on February 8, 2010

City Hall, Chicago

Only those on the left could ever come up with such towering propositions as granting terrorists the rights of citizenship, making public restrooms and college campus dorms co-ed, and offering needles to junkies at taxpayer expense.

You’d have to be a liberal to ever fashion such absurdities and consider them reasonable.

Enviro-fascists, one of leftism’s more colorful sub-groups, want – nay, demand – we clean ourselves with uncomfortable, xerox-paper smooth, sensitive-skin scraping bathroom tissue (because it’s better for the earth); they insist we install mercury-filled squiggly light bulbs in our homes in favor of planet-killing incandescent bulbs; they say we must re-use those flimsy plastic shopping bags when we go marketing because when thrown away, they strangle wildlife;  they would also have us believe that we can control the weather by making environmentally-friendly “lifestyle changes.”

Et cetera.

Inside Chicago’s City Hall, yet another one of these glorious, earth-saving, enviro-chummy, go-green, leftist ideas has met with some unintended – yet obvious and easily foreseeable – consequences.

To be frank, it stinks at City Hall. Words like repulsive, repugnant, putrid and rank come to mind.

It smells like liberal spirit.

It smells like – well, urine.


Two words: waterless urinals.

Fran Speilman from the Chicago Sun-Times writes:

There’s been a stench coming from the second floor of City Hall — and it has nothing to do with the steady stream of Chicago aldermen convicted on corruption charges.

Waterless urinals installed to promote water conservation in the public men’s room outside the City Council chambers have turned into a stinky mess. The odor got so bad that the “green” urinals are now being ripped out and replaced with the old-fashioned kind at a cost City Hall has refused to disclose.

The men’s room is now closed while the marble wall is “removed” and new urinals are installed.

Only liberals.

Rumor has it, because human exertion causes an increase in breathing – which means an increase in CO2 – City Hall is planning on doing away with all emergency exit staircases. In the event of an emergency, such as a fire, pillows will be placed on the ground underneath windows to accommodate escapees.

It makes good environmental sense.

Since the air will already be polluted from the smoke of a potential fire, the obligation of humans, as stewards of our fragile planet, to cut back on any additional atmospheric poisons is obvious.

In short, if people aren’t hustling down staircases, they cannot needlessly contribute to egregious increases in greenhouse gas levels.

You can almost hear Mother Earth sigh with relief.

Incidentally, the “flushless toilet” experiment is being given a few more months.

In other news, another foot of global warming is expected to fall here in New York City on Tuesday night,

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  1. proof said

    It’s nice to know that government is so flush with cash that they can afford both the green experiments and their replacements after they fail!

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